“What’s ADD Got To Do With It?”
Posted by Susan Epstein on April 1st, 2009 at 07:32am
Mindy Mazur, Special Ed Parent Coach
“Amy can’t read visual cues and she is not writing down the assignment posted on the blackboard” Amy is legally blind.
Or…
“Jack doesn’t listen very well” Jack is hearing impaired.
Or…
“Clara doesn’t follow directions when I ask the class to stand and form a single line” Clara is unable to walk and uses a wheelchair.
Hopefully you’ve never heard any of these statements. There would never be expectations of children who have physical disabilities, developmental delay, or neurological impairments to accomplish that which they will never be able to do. So why doesn’t this hold true for children with a diagnosis of ADD/ADHD?
What do I mean by that? Well there have been times when a teacher will be reporting on a student (with a diagnosis of ADD who is on an IEP) and state that he doesn’t focus and has difficulty staying on task. Or what about the comment section on a report card that lists the following: Inconsistent effort, not working to potential, poor organizational skills, and assignments not turned in.
I’ve also received emails from desperate parents asking for help and guidance because their 11 year old who has a diagnosis of ADD lacks self discipline and motivation for completing her homework on time.
Why if a child has been diagnosed with ADHD by a psychiatrist because they have met the diagnostic criteria according to the DSMIV (Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Psychiatric Disorders) do we expect them to do what they are neurologically unable to do? Of course with support and strategies established in their IEPs they will hopefully improve in these areas.
Parents and teachers just think how you would feel if someone was consistently critical of something you are innately unable to do. Children with ADD/ADHD have a real disability, let’s be helpful and not punitive.
Let me know your experiences and let’s start a dialogue.
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Tags: ADD, ADHD, calm parenting, children behavior, Special Ed Paren Coach, Special Needs Kids
Under Children+ Family+ Teens/Tweens
15 Comments for “What’s ADD Got To Do With It?”
1. Mitch | April 1st, 2009 at 8:17 am
Hi Mindy,
Interesting article. I think you have a great point and to take the idea a bit further, each child can only meet or exceed expectations that are custom designed for that child. My nephew was diagnosed a few years ago with atypical autism. Immediately, after the diagnosis, all expectations of him were completely to nothing. Normally, you would assume being totally devoid of expectations was a bad thing. But, it provided an opportunity to start with a clean slate. Now, two years later, he has made remarkable progress. Were stating to wonder if he is really autistic at all. His expectations and our expectations are significatnt, but, we all work together, with him to try to create successful benchmarks. He is a part of the creation of his goals and therefore he is often on board when creating expectations.
2. Mary Toso | April 1st, 2009 at 9:29 am
The printing is so small I don’t feel I know what is happening.
3. Susan Epstein | April 1st, 2009 at 9:32 am
Mary, try opening it up in a different brosser. I set the font very large. Try firefox.
4. Mary Toso | April 1st, 2009 at 9:35 am
Hi.
I have a son with a condition involving strong ADHD symptoms that did respond some to ritilan, but I took him off because he wasn’t helped enough to make it worth some side effects. He reads well, but his problems are showing up most in study habits with home work, math facts and holding onto a memory for math learning, and study for tests. He needs me to practically spoon feed him. I think the curriculum he has (McGraw Hill…) is poorly written for children with these needs. There are too many concepts per page and shifting into using different skills frequently even under the same practice portion. By the time I help him focus and understand one, they are moving on to the next, almost all of them require more than one step in the first place, and there isn’t enough practice on the steps involved for his memory so he can build on them. He understands and can do it eventually, but then it doesn’t get to his memory because the new idea is there. This is page after page up to the test and frustrates him and myself in helping him terribly. I have said this curriculum is not helping him.
5. Tracy | April 1st, 2009 at 10:19 am
Susan,
I am in diar need of aditional help. My 7 year old Daughter has ADHA along with other issues including young child delayed learning disorder, cronic eczuma overlaping Psoris. She is very imature for her age.
I am seeing the gap between her and her peers getting much larger as the months go on. She is what I call a walking tornado. When she walks in the room stuff just falls on the floor and there is an instant mess.
If not supervised constantly there is destructive behavior, writing on walls, painting on carpeting to nail polish, kid make up on mirrors & furniture.
I cannot trust her in the shower or bathtub not to use her special skin care needs only for her skin as she will dump the entire bottles into the tub with her, or she will gett into the family shampoo/soaps and will flair her skin up that will last for days.
I am at breaking point.
Susan or anyone else haveany suggestions?
6. Dar | April 1st, 2009 at 10:50 am
I have two adopted boys who have both been diagnosed with ADHD and ADD and it manifests differently in each. They are both on an IEP. I have to work with the school very closely to make sure the teachers and administration don’t forget both boys have disabilities. They have both spent much time in detention and suspensions and the teachers grow impatient with their inability to stay on task. IT is and I fear always will be a battle of wits and patience to keep the kids moving forward. It has to be hard on the kids to be the ones that get in trouble or are looked to as the instigators. Unstructured time is the worst. PE, “study time”, and hallway travel are the disaster potentials. We have as much tight structure at home as possible without making it a penal colony.
Its too bad that the schools don’t realize that teaching methods structured for ADHD/ADD children would be beneficial to all students.
7. Mindy | April 1st, 2009 at 11:19 am
Mitch; thanks so much for your very thoughtful response. Consider your nephew fortunate to have done so well and reach his goals. I understand you questioning his diagnosis. There can be several other learning disorders and mental diagnosis that have similar characteristics to high functioning Autism.
I’d be happy to expand on that with you.
Mindy
8. Jennifer | April 1st, 2009 at 11:43 am
Thank you. I really needed some validation. My daughter is 12. She is ADD, and was diagnosed in 4th grade. She has never had behavior issues, and it seems when she went into puberty (age 10) there was a drastic change in her. She could not focus, stay on task, and began having issues with Math. After many tears, meetings with her teacher and doctor, we made the decision to have her repeat the 5th grade. While she could have moved on to 6th grade, we all felt she needed more time to master math, and developmentally she needed another year to mature before heading to middle school. She was a young 5th grader based on her birthday in comparison to her peers. While I had doubts about whether or not this was the best decision for her, I know now it was the best thing we could have done for her. She too has an IEP, and has the same teacher this year as she did last year, so we are all on the same page. The way the public school system teaches seems to be a one size fits all, and I know my daughter will continue to struggle. My husband (her stepdad) and I have been looking into homeschooling, yet I am not sure if socially this would be the best avenue to take. The problem I am having involves my daughter’s biological father, stepmom and her paternal grandmother. They have pretty much written her off stating that they will be able to have a relationship with her once she is grown. I have tried and tried to keep the lines of communication open, and begged them to be a part of her life to no avail. I have been accused of being over emotional, irrational and a failure as a mother. They deem her not good enough due to my parenting failures. How have I failed? She did not pass 5th grade (again, we made the decision to hold her back), she lacks personal hygiene, she is immature for her age, cannot follow directions and has low self esteem. Sigh. They seem to think the ADD diagnosis is an excuse for me to be a poor parent. They expect her to be a mini adult. Of course I have taught my child personal hygiene. Of course I want what is best for my child. I am the one involved on a daily basis, my husband and I are the ones working with her, the school, her doctor. Yet, they sit back and judge. The problem is, this situation is hurting my daughter. She tries so hard. She is improving. We have to stay on her more so than with your average 12 year old. I am at a loss how to handle this situation. How can I help my child deal with all of this? I have worked so hard to instill a sense of self worth and to have high self esteem, and yet she still struggles in school and with her issues with her father and his family. I am really at a loss. Thank you for allowing me to share my story. I was feeling so alone, and so full of doubt.
9. Mindy | April 1st, 2009 at 6:57 pm
Jennifer: Thanks so much for sharing your story. You are not alone,what you are experiencing is happening to many families across the country. Children are incredibly resilient when they have just one adult who is there for them and believes in them no matter what. you are that adult. I’d be happy to email you or speak to you. I have some steps you can take but I have some questions.
Regarding your daughter’s hygiene- if and when she gets interested in boys- she will hit the shower.
Hope this helps some
10. Mindy | April 4th, 2009 at 1:47 pm
Thanks for all of you who responded to my blog. I did leave messages with most of you via your email. In case you didn’t receive it, here are some of the thoughts I shared :
Has your child been evaluated by school?
When was your child last evaluated?
Do you think there could be another LD or mental health problem that has yet to be diagnosed?
If you are not happy with accommodations of educational program, a parent can request a team meeting at any point in time.
Parenting a child with ADD/ADHD or any other LD or emotional problem is constant effort with schools, psychiatrists, etc,.
An evaluation or assessment is just a snapshot in time, as your child goes through the typical child development, their needs can change or new ones arise.
It can feel like looking for the pieces for a jigsaw puzzle so you can see what the whole picture looks like.
11. Sarah | April 4th, 2009 at 6:56 pm
Mindy,
I would like your opinion on my situation. My son was diagnosed with ADHD last summer and we were able to put him on my medication which has worked wonders in school and out. My issue is that the school took him off his IEP and put him on a 504 despite the fact that 1) he is only doing well b/c of the medicine and 2) his teacher has been perfect. Not only did I not want him off the Plan, but I also do not feel that they put enough detail on the 504 in terms of assistance that his teacher has used. I believe they think because he is on medication that he is not their problem any more. Please advise whom I should speak to to get someone to hear me.
Thanks !
12. Mindy | April 5th, 2009 at 8:28 am
Hi Sarah: Thanks for your post and unfortunately your situation is not unique.Before I can give you the appropriate response to your situation, I have a few questions. First, school districts can not make any decision without your input. Was their a team meeting where you were made aware of the changes the school was considering? Was your son reevaluated? if the district suspects that the student may no longer require special education services, then a reevaluation must occur since no decision to remove eligibility can occur without current and complete evaluation information.
At the reevaluation Team meeting, the Team after determining the existence of a disability(ies) must decide whether the student would continue to make progress in school without the continued provision of special education services. A student’s progress should not be judged solely on the completion of IEP goals or report card grades.
I would be happy to follow up with you via email,telephone, or chatting online to further discuss your situation and talk about what your options are.
13. Diana | April 6th, 2009 at 5:49 am
Hi, my daughter who is 11, started middle school. She was diagnosed with ADD in 3rd grade. Her elementary school was great in helping her with her struggles. My question is now that she is at a new school and they have only my word that she is ADD. Do they need to do a reevaluation on her? This IEP, 504 is all news to me. My daughter is failing 6 out of 8 classes. I keep thinking I’m not pushing her hard enough or I believe her medication still needs adjusting. The school certainly has not mentioned anything about rival’s or IEP, 504 etc… just more tutoring, after school. Can you explain what process is needed for me , in starting the help my daughter needs in this new school. Note: my child has never been evaluated by a school. She has only been diagnosed 3 yrs ago. Thanks for any input. I’m afraid I’ve hit on this a little to late in hopes of saving her from repeating the 6 grade.
sincerely,
Diana
14. Mindy | April 6th, 2009 at 10:48 am
Hi Diana: First, it’s never too late to help your child. Children are incredibly resilient as long as their is one adult who is there for them no matter what and your daughter has you. I would suggest you put in a written request that the school perform a Psycho-Educational Evaluation. They have 60 days to get this done once they receive a written consent from you. If you send the request through the mail use certified or registered mail so you will receive a receipt when school accepts it. If you hand deliver ask the school secretary/administrator to give you a receipt. According to the federal law IDEA: Each public agency must conduct a full and individual initial evaluation,before the initial provision of special education and related services to a child with a disability under this part.
(b) Request for initial evaluation. Consistent with the consent requirements either a parent of a child or a public agency may initiate a request for an initial evaluation to determine if the child is a child with a disability.
ADD is a real diagnosis that is made through a series of evaluations and assessments. There are no blood tests or brain scans that can provide this diagnosis, but the final diagnosis must be made by a child psychiatrist not the school.
15. Mindy | April 6th, 2009 at 5:10 pm
Based on the huge response to my
blog last week…
Parenting Powers is offering a FREE Tele-Class
tomorrow night.
I will walk you through the Federal Laws
around children with learning disabilities and
what you need to know and what steps you can
take immediately to make sure that
your child is adequately educated.
Mindy will also be available to answer any
pressing questions that you have.
Tuesday, April 7th 2009
6:00PM EST
(check your time zone)
Simulcast- telephone &/or Web
sign up and receive an email with information
on how to access the call.
Click here to register:
http://tinyurl.com/dzewaz
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